"Show me your wrists." To the majority of you, this is a simple statement. It's something you've probably said before to one of your class mates, whether it was said in a joking manner or not. I've heard this many times. Directed toward me by a stranger, looking only spite me and get a good laugh out of my discomfort. But it's not funny.
Now, my post has nothing to do with self harm. But I would like to add before I start that it's not a laughing matter; people really do struggle with cutting and it's not funny. It's not something to joke about.
I am a happy person. I am content about where I stand in life. I have a few good friends, a family that loves me, and education. But, I am different. I don't listen to the same music as most people. I don't wear clothes that are "the latest trends or styles." And my makeup is almost always slightly darker than the "pretty girls."
But here are a few things that I do do.
I laugh. I hang out with friends. I breathe. I strive to do my best. I need my mommy sometimes. I cry over boys. I sleep. I eat. I smile. I yearn for knowledge. I learn. I have emotions. Just like everyone else in this world.
I have hardships in my life, but don't we all? I know each and every one of us do. I am not going to go into my problems because that's not what my post is about either.
I deal with my problems in a positive way. I draw and write and I am also into photography. Music has also had a huge impact on my life. I am just like any other teenager, learning, awkward, and growing as a human being.
But just because I'm different, people try and label me. I'm stereotyped as "emo." And in today's society, this is a derogatory term for people who use self mutilation as an escape and listen to demonic music. When in reality, Emo is just short for emotional. But to tell you all the truth, I don't cut myself.
For those of you who have gotten to know me, I am a happy person. I'm blunt and honest. I'm outgoing and I'm there for anyone who needs me, no matter what.
Then, why? Why do people call me this?
Because I look a certain way and listen to a different kind of music. That's why. Because of the way I look. It sickens me that people have to label each other. We're all human beings. We all try to succeed. We all have emotions.
In fact, Stereotypes in general sicken me. If you play a sport, does that make you a jock? If you wear a skirt, does that make you a whore? If you excel in academics, does that make you a nerd? The answer to all of these questions is no.
And that's common sense... Isn't it?
See, that's the thing. Everyone wants that sense of belonging. Humans need that feeling. And yet, everyday, we label people and we hurt them, to the point where they're afraid to be themselves. And all of us have felt this way.
Humans "need" to have a sense of order. Organization. Social class. A caste system. So, we classify other human beings, our peers and ourselves, into this system.
Jocks.
Preps.
Nerds.
Skaters.
Goths.
Stoners.
These are just a few, and sadly there are many more. And I bet as you read each of those words, a stereotype of that group of people popped up into your head, and you were able to visualize this person with knowing nothing of them but their label.
Well, I don't know about the rest of you, but I am so tired of being labeled and categorized. And I know I'm not the only person who feels this way.
I am not a cereal box - don't label me.
okay i love love love the last line(: && i totally agree. I hate stereotypes! I have been labels soo many different things and it gets annoying. I dont care what people think of me anymore, because there's always someone who will disapprove. I think everyone would be happier if there were no labels.
ReplyDeleteYou go, girl! I don't give a care what other people think about me anymore; what they think about me cannot change who I am.
Delete"I am now in a world where I have to hide my heart
And what I believe in,
But somehow,
I will show the world what's inside my heart,
And be loved for who I am."
-Reflection (from Mulan; pop version)
I agree with Jujubean, we would be happier without stereotypes. I wish we could live in a world without them..
DeleteI think everyone agrees that everything would be better if there wasn't any stereotypes.
DeleteAHHHHH! i love this post because it is so true and i totally agree! i have been waiting for a post like this and its awesome! there is no reason for people being labeled into different groups at school! No one is a cereal box so no one should be labeled!:)
ReplyDeleteI think we should, by the end of the year, make shirts for everybody in the class that say, "I am NOT a Cereal Box-- Don't Label Me!"
DeleteAnd all wear them on the same day.
As improbable as that is, it is a fun idea to entertain, anyway... /:
I agree one hundred percent. People do not need labels; each individual is his or her own person.
ReplyDeleteI don't label people with anything other than their name--or, at the most, a friend--because I do not believe in labels.
One of my favorite pairs of sweats features six peeps, with different colors of glitter "sugar" on the sides but no "sugar" on the front. Below the row of peeps are two lines of writing: "INSIDE we're all the same"
Do I agree with that statement? Yes, I do.
We all look different, yes--we choose to wear different outfits, to style our hair differently, to listen to different music, to do different things, to speak different ways. We are all born with different DNA; many of us have different hair colors, eye colors, skin tones.
No two people are exactly alike. There is no reason to try and squeeze us all into a set form--to fit us to an exact label--because we will never fit.
What happens to the intelligent athlete, to the well-dressed nerd, to the cheerful goth? Who's to say a popular kid can't love singing, or a cheerleader can't like heavy metal?
We, as humans, are not made to fit into a single category. Why can't people just fit into multiple groups?
Agreed! I think that's the problem; people don't realize that we are really all the same and have something in common.
DeleteSam, you said what I attempted to say much better. "We, as humans, are not made to fit into a single category."
DeletePersonally, people who try to fit into a single category are boring--juvenile, even. As always, we would all be more happy if we weren't constricted to the limitations that society habitually establishes.
Wow, that was pretty good. It is awesome that you posted something about stereotypes.
ReplyDeleteI don't like stereotypes, and I keep saying that I am going to because I talk to "preps" that are really nice. I always stereotype, and I hate it. It is programed into my brain beyond my control. I wish I could stop, and I keep trying to, but then when a person passes, I am like "Oh, look at that kid, he is sooooooo ghetto." It annoys myself when I do it, so I keep trying to put up a mental block.
Now, even if I can stop my stereotyping, I can't stop people from stereotyping me. I get called a "nice" girl a lot since I have manners, and according to my friend, I gave off a "stoner" vibe when she met me when in fact I am not one. I think that stuff is gross. It bugs me being called a "nice girl" though, I was just raised to have good manners in public, I am really a slob, and I am not that nice, I only know when to be nice, I can actually be pretty mean, just ask someone that knows me.
I wish these stereotypes can stop for everyone, but people are always going to do it.
Agreed. I think that from the beginning of time, throughout history labels have defined people. I for one am not a fan of boxing people in and sticking them in one group. I have an array of different friends from all different backgrounds so I don't really feel I have a set label. I also think that people tend to flock towards people who look, feel, and act like them. They also shun anyone who does not fit the description of their group. One of the many problems with our society!
ReplyDeletevery well said Krystal, and i think if a person is labeled they should try their best to find the courage to stand up for themselves.
DeleteIf I had a dollar for every time someone did anything to me, I'd be a millionare. Anyone would be. Being bullied is part of life, and being pushed around is part of it too. We live in a pampered, struggle-free world; almost half of the population on earth does. Humans need struggle, and when there's no outside forces creating it, we create it ourselves. We get bored with what we have, and resort to starting "drama" with others of our kind -- An infinitely creative way to deal with self-inflicted boredom.
ReplyDeleteIt may not seem like it now, but I used to be in those shoes. Everyone made fun of me for the way I dressed and the way I acted and the music I listened to. I was the "goth" chick, and often called that "vampire emo lesbian" even before I identified myself as that. I still have those days where I really do the "goth" thing -- black lipstick, eyeliner, big black clothing, spiked jewelry. And you know what? Everyone teases me about it.
I suppose the whole point of this post, as I gravitated away from it, was telling all you people to suck it up. It's going to happen, people are going to make fun of you, and it's either deal or die at this point. Someone calls you emo? Feed into it. Like this:
Person: Let me see your wrists emo kid!
You: Sure! You want to see my rope burns where I tried hanging myself too?
Or...
Person: You dyke!
You: Oh wow! Fudge, I just, I never knew that I was a lesbian! God, wow, now my life is just ruined and you totally just hurt my feelings.
People are always going to murmur crap behind your back. I went from being "weird" to "fat" to "emo" and "goth" and now I'm "that lesbian" or "dyke". And you know what? It's true. I am a lesbian, I am a dyke, I am a butch. I was fat, I was emo, and I was weird. I still am goth, though less than before. It's all true. But the collateration of all of those things creates how I look now, and I don't give a flying fudge about what anyone is going to tell me about it.
Everyone would be happier without labels, but they aren't going away. So, basically, just deal.
Its sad that labels aren't going to go away, because most people say they hate them, but nobody tries to stop it.
DeleteLet me start out with this: The last line just made my day.
ReplyDeleteAnd I completely agree with it, too. People shouldn't have categories; we don't have sub-species like other animals. We are all people. We may have different abilities, and different strengths and weaknesses, but that is what makes us different from every other person in the world. People should not judge other people; they are not God. They act as if they know exactly who or what we are. Like they know everything about us, or everything we've been through. Like WE even know who or what we "are" when we're teenagers-- that's what we're trying to find out!
I want to be a professional musician -a rock star- when I get older. I want to be on a stage bigger than the Superdome, inside a stadium bigger than the city of Chicago. But when people think "Rock Star," they tend to think things I never want to be or do. I want to be in it for the music, and the glory isn't mine anyway.
But I also want to be the one to break some of those stereotypes. The one that will show people that they don't have to label people or label themselves.
And I will stop there, because I did this once and it got erased, so perhaps I can elaborate sometime later.
Sarah, you're an inspiration to me and I'm sure many others. I know that if you put your mind to it, you can do whatever you wish to. Is your musical talent singing?
DeleteWell, thank you for the compliment!
DeleteHAH! No, my musical talent is not singing. I do recall saying in class, "I can't carry a tune in a paper bag." I play guitar. I would love to be in a band other than the one for my church, but there are not many people out there who appreciate the good ol' rock and roll like I do. It's sad, really; I can make it come back someday. :D
i think there will always be steriotypes so the sooner we accept it, the happier we will all be. I say this because there really isnt a way to get rid of it. what people think and say cant be contolled. no matter how hard you try (just admit it) you will start to judge a person as soon as you see them, it's natural and we cant help it. but it's how you take those first impressions about others and if you choose to speak rudely about them before getting to know them. we all have a responsibility here.
ReplyDeleteI definitely agree. It's a bit of a lost complaint, because people aren't going to stop.
DeleteTo be honest, I don't feel like I heed the repugnance from which stereotypes descend with much importance. Perhaps it's because I'm oblivious--optimistic, even. At this point, I have disdained the troubles that some face at the cost of certain labels; I don't see a label when I see someone. I never thought of you as "emo," either.
ReplyDeleteI sometimes confuse two people: those who try to conform to a stereotype and those who have a negative stereotype that unwillingly conforms to them. Personally, the senselessness of people confining themselves within a certain stereotype is unbelievable.
I do know the reason for stereotypes. I know that stereotypes provide a societal standard by which others can excel and condescend those below. As human beings, we all strive to be different in some way--to stand out. That being said, I think that stereotypes are inevitable.
I'm happy to know that you can deal with being stereotyped positively and I feel your pain for those who are belittled because of their music and clothes. It truly is disheartening.
AGREEEEED! HUNNNNNNGER GAMMMMMES
DeleteHUUUUUNNNNGGGER GAMES!
DeleteGreat response, you got the point across very clearly.
DeleteIt makes me mad that people stereotype other people. If you don't like being labeled then don't label other people. I hate when people think you changed just because you changed your appearance. In the beginning of the year three people told me I looked really preppy and now that I cut my hair, they said that I'm an emo freak and should just leave them alone. Yeah so that's why it makes me mad, just because someone changes their appearance doesn't mean they change who they are.
ReplyDeleteexactly! thru this year, I have gone thru very many phases! I'm sure you of all people have seen it melissa. I have gone from preppy, goth, girly, and hippie. Every time i change my appearance, other people comment on how different i look or how i have changed. my friends set up an "intervention" to tell me they were worried about me because I have "changed" this past year. I will agree that I have changed somewhat because this year was really crappy for me, but I'm not as different as people think I am. I noticed that you have changed your apperance, but I love your look!! It shows who you are. && that kid who said you were an emo freak and need to leave them alone, well, he's obviously verrrrry stupid!! lol
DeleteI can relate to this completely! Many people I know used to call me a freak and an emo and now they just call me types of things that I don't even understand. How about I help ya out there. I'm Bethany nice to meet ya!
DeleteYeah, I've been labelled as a nerd who knows how many times since elementary school. And not because of the way I look but because I would answer the questions all the time and catch things so much easier than others. Just because I'm smart doesn't mean I'm not a cool person to talk to.
DeleteI personally love your hair cut, but honestly if the people that you were talking to said something like that to you they arent true friends to really anyone. shady people csannot be real at all and they just proved that they are shady!
DeleteThe last line= GENIUS!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteAnyways, I know what you mean. Stereotypes annoy the crap out of me, and kind of ruined my first year of school. For kindergarten and preschool, I was home-schooled by my mom, who even though she had me while in high school, graduated with over 4.0 GPA. So going to first grade, when I was meant to go to second startled me. It was because of my age and they had no idea that I was smarter than the other students, because they didn't teach me. OK, no biggie. But that didn't stop other kids from feeling awkward around me. I was smarter. And I didn't know that there was a problem with that. People older than me always congratulated me for it, so kids my age would think that was cool right? No.
A kid on my bus two years older than me didn't think so. He called me a nerd. He made fun of my teacher's name. He called me fat. And I was a twig. He called me fat when I was practically skin-and-bones. That threw me off. And because of my being christian, he asked me if I was going to be a fat nun when I grew up. He was supposed to be christian himself, and he was doing this. Ghandi once said something that caught my attention, "I like your christ, I do not like your christians. Your christians are not like your christ." Of course I've gotten over it, but if I hear his name or see him, even though I know he's not like that anymore, I still dont like him.
Anyway. Stereotypes hurt. Words hurt. Sometimes more than "sticks and stones." And people need to get over their words. Especially women--they hold grudges forever. And if they (and people in general) just let it go, then the world would just be happier in my opinion. But at the same time, Like you said--WE HAVE TO.
Its so sad, but we do. And I wish we didnt.
I agree one hundred percent. In fact, it was just the other day that I was called a stoner because it's allergy season for me and my eyes were red, :/. It's ridiculous how people think they know everything before they have even heard your voice.
ReplyDeletethat happened to me to i thought it was hilarious how closely it looked the same.
DeleteI laugh at stereotypes and at how serious people take them. I'm not in anyway mocking you but I find it funny how society has depended on these labels so much that as we grow we actually WORRY about the way we may grow up and how much we are scared of how people think of them. The AMAZING thing is that, THEY DO NOT EXIST! There is no such thing as EMO or PREPPY or STONERS. Those words carry no meaning UNLESS you let them. I'm called "scene, emo, hipster." I have absolutely no idea what any of that means and I don't care to. People just need to grow up and get over themselves, but they won't and the words won't ever go away.
ReplyDeleteI think people who do that to their body are just asking to be labeled they are putting themselves out there and taking that path instead of an alternate one. now granted i do not know everyones life story or why they do this to put themselves out there all i am saying is there is alternate routes that you can take to be noticed.
ReplyDeleteI think the true preps and jocks and whatever else are the ones who label other people. A few years ago I was walking with my friends and we saw these girls calling each other preps. It went something like:
ReplyDelete"OMG you stupid prep!"
"You're the stupid prep!"
"There is no way I'm a prep!"
And so on. So I just walked up to them and said, "Only preps go around calling other people preps." and walked away. Behind me I could hear them both shut up, probably thinking about how I was being a prep. But if you think about it, they were acting like a person you define as a prep.
Wow I don't think I've ever typed the word "prep" so much in my life!
Lol I find myself wanting to know who it was XD
DeleteSTEREOTYPES STEREOTYPES STEREOTYPES!!!!! They're lovely, right? sike. I hate them they are incredibaly annoying.
ReplyDeleteI have to say, I do like them when used against me because it honestly helps me to not be involved with drama because 90 percent of that people that find out I'm a fighter think I'm an a## so they dont try anything. heck most people dont even talk to me because of it but on the other hand i hate them because of the fact that even though I dont like people it makes it insainly hard for me to start meeting new people.